Category Archives: Aging

When My Spring Comes…

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Spring. Unpredictable weather. Thunder storms. March winds. April Fools. Warm teasing sunny days. Snow slipping in for a final blow. Birds gathering nest materials. Male seeking female. Procreation. The pink, yellow and silky white of blossoms against a back drop of mint green. The sleeping mountains waking up.

Promise.

There is something about the Spring season. For this particular year, this flash in my life, Spring’s abstract nature is in complete accord with my own. More than at any other time in my life. The culmination of years has funneled down to our here and now. Rain swollen banks giving way under the pressure of life. I don’t want to use the term last chapter of my life…I prefer saying the next chapter. I don’t want to use the term, Golden Years, either, as I’ve yet to see it’s shiny glint. Perhaps it’s been dulled by the regret of time poorly spent.

For now, I guess, I’m in the Fall of life. Seems fitting. My leaves are a bit faded and crumpled. My life’s blood is slowly draining…leaving me a little less colorful. And it’s okay. That is the beauty of this season. Even as winter approaches and it’s harder to get warm, I’m learning to be perfectly okay with it. Yes, my focus has narrowed. The spectrum will probably narrow still more in the coming years, if I’m granted them. Acceptance. That is God’s gracious gift to me, to all of those in my particular forest.  It is VICTORY!
Where, O death, is your victory?” read more…

Spring will come again. To those who choose to follow Christ, reaching the end of our winter means only that we’ll be sown, tended, then, praise God, raised up new!!

Find me at www.godsizeddreams.com on April 12th.

“Just Like That…”

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“The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom; all who follow his precepts have good understanding. To him belongs eternal praise.”  Psalm 110:10

And just like that everything has changed.

A breath was taken, an eye was blinked and everything morphed into now. I look back and realize I’ve crested the top of the proverbial hill. Not only crested it but am well on my way to the foot of the other side. The front side is but a memory. That side was full of expectation, fresh green shoots and buds. And oblivion. All that came before my twenties is now distorted by my present. Somewhere between the summit and the now the mirror has begun to reflect life’s sorrows, grief, strain and stress. Photo’s tell the tale of a life that’s been lived. Yet hasn’t life just begun?

And just like that everything has changed.

My future is the now, there is even some past on this side of the hill. My aging mother, thankfully doing well. Two sisters prematurely widowed, one recent, one distant but acutely remembered. Learning to be alone after being part of another. Extended family losing grandparents at a normal age, losing their parents at a way to young age. The flesh of my flesh is on the verge of cresting his own hill, the flesh of his is on the arduous, exciting ascent. That time when the future is spread out like promise. I own eyes that are dimming, bones that creak, and joints that ache. Struggling to accept what’s happening to the flesh that my life’s blood courses through. My ways are set. Blessedly blessed to view life anew through the lenses of my grand-children’s telescopes. Blessedly blessed to have made it this far and understand that aging is a gift.

And just like that everything has changed.

My generation has become…the way of the past. We remember how it used to be. We remember and think, as compared to now, it wasn’t all that bad. Even as my generation and those before continued to dissemble family values and morals. Do the answers lie then in how age perceives it? Am I my Granny? Shaking my head at the obscenities on social media and television and railing at current day politicians? I don’t thinks so. I believe our children know that lines have been crossed. I believe that on some level they cling to yesteryear’s moral lifeline though there seems nothing moral today. Sadly I believe that the majority of my grand-kid’s generation is in the mud and the mire. Flailing around trying to find solid ground. I believe they want to believe in something desperately. My heart of hearts sinks at what babies, toddler children and teens in this current world are being taught. I weep at what is being accepted as normal and that it’s being devoutly adhered to and defended. And I pray come Lord Jesus, come!

And just like that…I breathe. Jesus.

Jesus! Name above all names! Holy, holy, holy! Only in You can our hope rest. Open the heart eyes and ears of the lost that they might be lifted out of the pit of deceit and despair. Make hearts receptive to Your saving grace. Make known that glorious river of Your peace that flows right beside every aspect of life. Oh God, let free will’s see the green pastures You give us to lie in! They are present even in the bleakest landscape. God we walk now in the valley of the shadow yet we won’t fear. You are near. You are ever present and have already been where we’re heading. Thank you. Give Your children new eyes to see that Your way is the moral way. Your way brings wholeness and light. Give our hearts a new desire to step up and rally together. Let us not fear the ravages of aging, rather grant us the desire to use it to share our stories, our faith and our wisdom. Let us rail against the immorality rather than fitting in with it. We still have work to do, grant us strength! Let us make known the lifeline of Your Salvation and Your moral compass. In Christ’s name always, amen, amen and amen.

Colossians 2:8
Joshua 13:1
Psalm 40:2
Psalm 23

 

New Direction…

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Greetings Readers!

I’m new to blogging and haven’t quite found my voice yet. I do know that the content of this blog will be for the glorification of God. Whatever topic I gravitate toward will be based on Biblical truths. I will continue to post  my writings here but I’d like to add to that and to hear from you! Feel free to critique my writing, gently please, or to voice your thoughts and concerns on the different topics contained in the posts. However, you may not use foul language nor take God’s name in vain.

I think some of a certain age are leery of commenting on a blog site, and it’s understandable, I’m of that age!  I now have a facebook page to connect this too, I’ve no idea what this means yet. I’m still learning this stuff so bear with me…mercy!

Speaking  Of A Certain Age…

I am in a phase of my life where aging is rapidly marking it’s territory. Mentally, physically, spiritually, emotionally. I’m finding it extremely difficult to deal with. I don’t mean to discount men’s discomfort with the process, I know they grapple with the same things, but they do appear to have an easier go of it?

I’m praying constantly for God to help me move through this phase. The hardest thing to deal with is, what’s next? After menopause what is next? I’ll be the old people and for the life of me I can’t believe it’s happening. I do not mean this as a slur to those older than me, quite the contrary…I need your input and wisdom! I need to know it’s ok.

I feel as if I’ve just blinked my eyes and I’m a grandmother of a teenaged female and a pre-teen boy. But wasn’t my son just born? I’m concerned for my mother who seems frail and forgets things. How did my 20 year old body get in this shape? Even my earlobes appear to have changed…there is not enough retinol A! Even as I lament the loss of some youthful attributes shame creeps in.  I’m thankful to be alive and healthy, it’s a miracle due to the way I lived for so long.

So, how do you handle being over say…45ish? And if you’re still a youngin what do you hope to achieve? I’d love to hear from you!

Since my youth, God, you have taught me,
and to this day I declare your marvelous deeds.
Even when I am old and gray,
do not forsake me, my God,
till I declare your power to the next generation,
your mighty acts to all who are to come.
Psalm 71:17,18