Since it’s beyond obvious, I’ll not bore you with another line about how long it’s been since I’ve been here to my happy place. A place where I’ve shared parts of my soul, my past, and my heart hurts. A place that’s helped me heal and move forward. Thank you Jesus!
June 21, 2017. The summer solstice. The longest day of the year and I’m as behind as I always am, only now I can’t figure out why. Our kids have long since fled the nest and our grands are changing at an alarming rate. I work part time and still feel like the hours just leave me in the dust. My husband retired this month. RETIRED. I, we, can’t seem to wrap our heads around it. We have plans that, if God will it, have our hearts racing with cautious excitement.
After last Spring and Summer I hold my breath a lot these days. I’ve learned to plan but stay restrained. I’ve learned to hope but only in Jesus, not mankind or life. I’ve learned how to be happy down deep, even if it doesn’t quite make it to the surface, or shine in my eyes. I’ve learned to let go of so many things that weighed me down. Finally, I’ve learned that aging is pretty cool. There are a lot of freedoms that come with that!! Yes, I still hate bathing suits, but then I think I always have. I try to avoid full length mirrors at all costs, especially with fluorescent lights. Mercy.
I bemoaned my lost youth to my mom the other day she asked, “Patti…are you happy?” Thankfully I could reply yes. Very much so. She then said, “so let the rest go.” I think for once in my life I’ll heed my mamma’s advice. God loves me, then and now. He still has a plan for my life.
Ephesians 2:10 (NIV)
“For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works,which God prepared in advance for us to do.”
Some time in August you’ll find me on www.godsizeddreams.com where the theme for that month is something like, reaching for your dreams even as you age. May I just say, it ain’t easy?!
Stay strong brothers and sisters. Stay in the Word and be a light in a world gone mad.